Searching for the Reception Location

View of patio, Piedmont Park, and midtown skyline from Park Tavern

Alright so, last I was actually talking about wedding planning, I had made appointments to tour two reception location options.  On my first available day off work I visited the Piedmont Room at Park Tavern.

Piedmont Room decorated for a wedding

Park Tavern is a restaurant and bar right on Piedmont Park in midtown Atlanta.  There is an upstairs (The Piedmont Room) and a downstairs bar area, which opens out into their garden tent and patio.  Both the Piedmont Room and the garden tent are advertised as wedding ceremony or reception locations.

Garden Tent decorated for a wedding reception

I have eaten at Park Tavern multiple times and so have enjoyed both the downstairs bar area and the garden tent.  I love the location, watching the sun set and the midtown skyline light up.  However planning a wedding in January, I figured the garden tent was out of the question.  So I was eager to see what the Piedmont Room (upstairs) looked like.  I arrived and was taken on a short tour.  While the Piedmont Room is beautiful and the windows overlooking Piedmont Park and the midtown skyline were breathtaking, the room was a little too white and wedding-y for my taste.  (Did I mention in my massive list of picky-ness that I was hoping for a darker, more tavern-like feel?)  I asked if the downstairs bar was an option, and I was assured that it was, but that it could only hold 70 for a seated dinner or 100 for hors d'oeuvres.

Downstairs bar area- this is exactly how I want the reception to feel

I was fairly convinced already in the planning process that a seated dinner was the very preferred option (taking into account the parents as well as Ryan and I here) and even 100 was under our guest list projections.  I was somewhat disheartened as the dark wood, low lantern lighting, and brick fireplace was definitely the look I was going for.  However I was a little put off by the knowledge that up to six weddings can take place over a weekend at Park Tavern, and that I was treated somewhat like a number even during my tour.  (The woman showing me around was very nice and accommodating, I just felt somewhat rushed.)  So perhaps the guest list not fitting downstairs was for the best after all.

My tour of Magnolia Hall next!

[All images found here.]

Responsible Wedding Planning

I know I am again interrupting my own train of thought, but I guess I am going to have to accept that randomness in myself!  I just got through reading two postings about wedding spending, frivolousness, obsessiveness, and being a feminist.

If you know me well at all, you know that being a feminist is pretty important to me.  Being a conscious, responsible person is also pretty important to me.  I don't always do a great job of being either, but these are values that I hold.

Planning a wedding has been and continues to be an uncomfortable journey for me.  I love the planning, I LOVE the organization, I love daydreaming about how ecstatic and terrified I will be all at once to walk down the aisle to the man I love.  At the same time I am definitely uncomfortable with a lot of the traditions and a lot of the seemingly frivolous spending that comes with planning a wedding.  I am thrilled to see this topic being discussed passionately by so many intelligent women.  (And I am making the assumption at this point that it is women writing about this topic, as that is all I have read.  But please- I am agreeable to men blogging, caring about weddings, and being feminists too!)

This is a conversation I believe needs to be had for a generation of women who both want to have a traditional wedding celebration, yet want to be conscious, responsible, and feminists.  I fear a polarizing between sets of women: the ones who are going all out planning their traditional weddings, and the ones who are trying to go against the traditional system.  As much as I think a balance can and IS being found, I felt some animosity in some of what I read tonight.

Most of us are coming from a traditionally male dominated society.  Some of us believe it is very much still this way (and for some it is).  We have the responsibility to ourselves and to future generations to determine what step we will make in the continuing of traditions and of weddings.  I think the reason weddings are so important to this discussion are that they are rites of passage; traditions in a society that define our culture in many ways.  And while there are vast variations on weddings, many themes are common.  So I believe this conversation is beyond that of environmental consciousness (which is still very important), or of who is spending too much money or time on their wedding (also a good conversation to have).  To me it is much more about: what are we saying about ourselves as women, as Americans, and as humans as we plan our weddings?  Are we conscious of these things?

And most importantly, in my opinion, are we supporting each other in this sometimes joyful, sometimes difficult, and frequently confusing journey?

(Cheerful posting about reception locations to resume tomorrow.)

First Things First: When and Where?

You all will have to forgive me for not posting yesterday and until the late hour tonight!  Class started back up last night and I have been playing catch up, getting used to being back into the swing of things.

To continue the catch up trend, I thought I would take you back to right after Ryan and I got engaged.  We celebrated with family and friends over Christmas, and set the date for sometime in January of 2009.  This would give me time to finish my Masters degree and still plan with some amount of sanity intact, and also hopefully allow us to get married in the small window before my brother went back to Iraq and Mary left for Australia (study abroad Spring 09).  So with this in mind, we set about deciding where to get married.

Other locations were suggested by different parties, but in the end having the wedding in Atlanta seemed like the best scenario.  We want to showcase our new home here with all of our friends and family.  So to begin our venue search, we knew we wanted a few things:

1. The ceremony would take place in a Catholic church.  Which one was totally up in the air, as neither of us was currently attending church.  However the religion question was easy as we were both raised Catholic and it is closest to what we both wish to practice.

2. The reception location had to hold between 100 - 150 guests, and be reasonably priced (definition of 'reasonably' to be determined at a later date).

3. If possible, the location would showcase Atlanta and the things we love about it.

4. It would not be in a hotel ballroom.

5. It would not be overtly "Southern" looking.  [This is not because I don't love this look- I moved to the South for a reason!  However, it is not us (yet, but I am trying!) and I wanted something to represent us as a couple.]

6. It would not be "stuffy" or "pretentious."  (aka I wanted to be somewhere that I could relax and enjoy myself and not feel like I had to be on my best behavior; formal locations would not be a good fit.)

7. If possible, it would be in walking distance to hotels and other nightlife in case we wanted to after-party and not add to possible drunk driving.

Phew!  Looking at my list, I realize why I had such a hard time!  Most all of the beautiful locations I found either looked way too Southern for my taste, were too formal, or were not in an ideal location.  The other concern I had was the expense, as beautiful wedding locations in the city of Atlanta seem to come with quite a price tag!

You may be thinking I drove myself crazy with these guidelines, but there is a relatively easy happy ending.  I already had a location in mind, but I went through the motions and did my research to give hard data to back up the place my heart was set on.

I spent a few minutes at work on my lunch break calling two locations and setting up appointments: the Piedmont Room at Park Tavern, and Magnolia Hall in Piedmont Park.

images from www.piedmontroom.com

images from www.piedmontpark.org

I will let you know later how we chose which location was right for us, but before I do: What crazy requirements did you have in choosing your ceremony or reception venue?  Did you have your heart set on  a place long before you got engaged?

Proposal Part Two: The Leap of Faith

So when I left you, Ryan had hatched some kind of plan.

We went to Baltimore for Thanksgiving to visit Ryan's parents, and while there spent a few hours with Mary touring her college campus.  Ryan requested some alone time with Mary, and I knew that he was serious.  When we returned home, he asked for my dad's phone number.  Definitely serious.  So I called in my reinforcements.

Now I am not entirely proud of this, but I truly hated this whole process.  Most other girls would have been celebrating right?  And I didn't know why I couldn't.  (Something to do with being terrified of commitment and having trust issues?)  All I knew was that I hated being left out of the most important decision of my life, and I hated everyone else knowing about it before me.  It didn't feel like mine.  I wish I could say that I got over it and let Ryan propose like a normal person, but I didn't.  I called Mary and another friend I knew Ryan had talked to, and I clarified the details.

With their help I deducted that Ryan was giving me a family heirloom ring.  I had known about it's existence for more than a year, and was fairly sure he had gotten it from his mom over Thanksgiving.  I also deducted that Ryan would propose before Christmas, as my big brother was returning from Iraq a few days prior and we were going to Orlando to see the whole family, and then ending the holiday break back in Baltimore with his parents.  My sources confirmed my suspicions after they heard the insane panic in my voice.  Everyone told me I was over-reacting, and to calm down.  But for some reason I could not be calm.

After the first week of December passed with me on edge every time I was in Ryan's presence, I broke down and told him what I knew.  And told him how crazy it was making me.  At first I think he was frustrated (who can blame him???) but finally I think he realized how important being part of the decision was for me.  He asked if I would feel better if I had more preparation, and of course I said yes.  He then simply asked if I would go on a walk with him on the 15th.  I broke down crying and of course said yes again.  I think that moment was the real proposal moment for me- knowing that we had finally decided "together-ish" that we were going to get married.  Now I just had to wait for the ring, but now I knew it was coming, because Ryan had told me.  We were doing this together.  My panic started to go away.

On the 15th (after buying new clothes to wear, and of course telling all of my friends in advance, because that's how I do things) I got ready and sat around waiting for him to come get me.  We awkwardly and silently drove to Starbucks, and then to Piedmont Park.  We got out of the car, although it was slightly drizzling.  Half way across the park, CRACK!  Lightning struck loudly and suddenly it started pouring.  Ryan looked concerned, but it just made me laugh.  We were under an umbrella, after all.  Well apparently he had grand plans, but considering the rain we found some stairs next to the lake, and Ryan got down on his knee in the rain, and opened the ring box.  (Upside down.  But that's why I love him.)  I laughed and pulled him up out of the rain and said yes.  We both got soaked, but it was worth it for a perfect moment alone in the middle of Piedmont Park, standing in the rain, agreeing to spend our lives together.

In retrospect, I wish I had been less anxious, but I have forgiven myself for that one.  I do think I would have enjoyed the moment more were I not so insanely concerned about what was going on.  I have long ago accepted, however, the emotional path that I am on and at this moment it was a scary thing to agree to commit my life to someone, even if I fully believe Ryan is the person I want to make that commitment to.  So I want to give encouragement to other massively anxious kids out there- look!  This is how someone with anxiety, trust issues, and fear of commitment gets engaged.  And I could not be happier.

And if you read all of that, I know you want pictures!!

normal post-engaged photo (thanks L!)

(L said we didn't look excited enough)

Victoria's Secret Bridesmaids?

found here

What do you guys think?  Can dresses from Victoria's Secret be Bridesmaids Dresses?

Invitation Planning: Continued

So of course I had to keep working on it, and luckily I found inspiration for how I want to put it all together.  (Makes me think it might be too busy with the name on there too.)  But you get the drift of what I am imagining, correct?

Image found here (PS: I love this girl)

In the meantime, I am starting to think that black backing with the opal stardream on the front might be prettier, and perhaps more striking?  I don't know, it might be too much black when it's all put together.  But I think it looks good here.  (Use that imagination and picture it without the white behind the scrollies and also without all the info blocked out, of course.)

You likee?

We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Program...

... with this important message:

Ha!  Y'all thought I was going to finish my story!  But sorry, this takes precedence.  Clearly I have been staying up at night working on my invitation design, seeing as how my paper and book arrived yesterday afternoon!

It is sooo formal, and way more serious than I thought it would end up being.  And girly.  I really think it's girly.  (EEK!)  But... I kind of love it!  I know it's simple and basic and all that- but anyone who knows me knows I love simple and basic.

(sorry about the erased bits)

Imagine Stardream Opal backing with Soft White Paper Source paper as the front piece.  And the second image is my maybe belly band there to hold the other pieces in once it's all put together (ie: info card, rsvp card).  I thought maybe instead of an inner envelope, I could have black satin ribbon with a little name card holding it all together.  And for my little sample there, Mom is sending one to herself!  (Awwww!)  Or we could also try it without the name:

Thoughts?  Please let me know what you think... But make sure you say it as super nicely as possible!  I love really really nice (and flattering) constructive feedback.  Thank you!

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